This can be such a positive thing.
This can result in a person becoming the best possible version of themselves. Reaching new goals. Exceeding expectations. Blowing the minds of all those around them.
This can also very easily turn into a very negative thing.
If you were to get to know me on a face to face/ personal/ in real-life kind of way, you would come to realise pretty quickly that I am crazy.
Ok, you might have already guessed that, but also that I am crazy hard on myself. I push and push myself until I reach whatever task is laid out in front of me- whatever it is. I don't tolerate failing, it's not an option and this has lead me to achieve some pretty awesome things that I look back on and smile at. Like painting an entire wall in my bedroom. By myself. At the age of 12. Like landing my first back flip and first no-handed cartwheel. Like ingraining in my memory the first 30 decimal places of pi. And that's just a few of the examples that come to mind!
I'm a control freak, organisational, hard working maniac... and it's one of my most treasured qualities. Until it starts to have a negative affect.
I mentioned in a post how I ran for 2 hours for the first time and didn't think twice about that fact until I read a very important comment. The commenter told me (in a really nice way- I truly appreciate it) That I should be careful not to overdo it on the running, it could end badly. I stopped, the world paused and I thought about this.
It was at this point that I realised my 'pushing-myself'' side had taken over and instead of enjoying the run for all those reasons listed above, I was gaining pleasure (if I can call it that) from increasing my distance to ridiculous amounts. I was ignoring the toll these long distances were taking on my body. Did I really need more stress (ie. worrying about waking up at 4:00am so I can fit in my run before school) added to the ginormous mountain of stress year 11 already has weighing on me? The answer is a big fat no!
So what did I do the following day when I had a pre-planned run? I slept in a little. Then I did a quick thirty minute sprint/ run to gain strength and speed. Previously I would have hated this because I wouldn't have felt like it was a proper workout as it was so quick a mere 1/4 of my usual runs, but I knew then and there that it was important I alternated between ridiculously long runs and shorter, faster ones.
And you know what? I felt great for the rest of the day. Isn't it ironic how much I preach about listening to one's body and I had basically duct taped my body's voice.
I'm not going to lie, the next day I felt a little guilty, I didn't have the aches and pains of my usually day-after-run and I sort of felt like I should eat less. Then I gave myself a mental slap and told myself there are much bigger things to worry about...
like the upcoming heart dissection in human bio. Good times. :)
Your turn:
Have you ever pushed yourself to achieve something awesome?
Have you ever pushed yourself too hard?
What was the consequence?
That's just me Thinking Out Loud on this Thursday! Thanks as always to Spoons for hosting this link-up each week! Have a great day friends! BYE! :D
I can definitely relate to pushing myself too hard, and it never ends well. It's never an easy thing for us over-achievers to take a step back and chill a bit, but it's usually in our best interest. It's great to be motivated and want to achieve bigger and better things, but you reach a point where your efforts are actually negated by the physical and mental toll you put on yourself. Glad you're realizing that you need to ease up sometimes :)
ReplyDeleteSteph--sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo proud of you! This takes lots of courage and strength. I know that I have had this same problem and fight to this day with it. But I am slowly learning to turn the "i'll do one more set or twenty more minutes" with the justification that it will make me stronger or test how far my body can go into "I'll stop here or just move and have fun for a certain amount of time for health and to wake my body up". Sometimes it takes more mental strength to do less than it takes physical strength to do more. I struggle with food and exercise and have taken advantage of both aspects. I am trying to fight my way out of fear of food and exercise and fall in love with life and myself. I am so proud that you are strong enough to realize this about yourself at such an early age and actually stop and refocus your goals and intentions. If you are a praying person--pray for me in that. You are such an encouragement and an awesome example. Keep up the good work precious soul!
ReplyDeleteHeather,
ReplyDeleteI can't thank you enough for this comment and your previous comment that actually made me realise I was over doing it! I could totally see my world starting to focus primarily around food and especially exercise and I could feel myself falling down a dark hole that was getting harder to dig myself out of- and you helped me with that! For that I will be extremely thankful and include you in my prayers each day! You are a gem and I'm sure one day we will both be free of this hold over-doing it can have over our entire beings! :)
Thanks again, so so much for your comment- made my day!
Steph 2 chef xxx